These Are a Few of My Favorite Things...

This Sunday will be my wedding anniversary, so this post is inspired by a letter I wrote my husband in February, right after Valentine's Day. He and I were enrolled in and were also facilitators of a marriage enrichment class at the time.

Because of things we were learning in the class, we had just broken through a major communication barrier in our relationship. I hasten to add that this only happened because we worked very hard to obtain it. We waded into issues that had snuck into our relationship decades ago and become deeply ingrained patterns. To address them required facing old hurts and misunderstandings. However, at the conclusion of the process, the result was delightfully satisfying.

I began to wonder why we couldn't have discovered these new strategies earlier -- our first three decades of marriage would have been so different. I began to feel sadness and regret when I suddenly realized: we are not behind! This is a very good time to begin communicating more effectively and on a deeper level. In fact, we're just in time: in time to model and pass this new behavior on to our four children, in time to allow this new intimacy be the backdrop for the earlier 33 1/2 years. How rich.

It was my Sweetie who began the process by stepping out in courage, gentleness, truthfulness, and hope. This freed me to match the behavior he was modelling and be vulnerable too. In the letter, I was expressing my appreciation and gratitude for his willingness to blaze a new trail for us, ushering in this greater connectedness and emotional intimacy. I compared my experience of our new relationship to some of my favorite things:

• raspberry swirl cheesecake
• filet mignon, medium rare
• Asti Spumanti
• chocolate covered macadamia nuts
• pineapple [picked and eaten in Hawaii]
• a ride on a catamaran
• watching hummingbirds
• stroking the soft fur on the kitty's tummy
• puddle jumping
• spotting a rainbow
• blowing dandelion puffs
• watching a helium balloon float up and up until you can't see it any more
• taking off your shoes and walking in warm sand
• making snowballs
• eating snow cones
• sitting on our big front porch during a soft rain
• rocking a baby to sleep
• nothing we've ever had before, even during the very best of times

Keeping with the whole Sound of Music theme, I'm quite sure I didn't do anything in my youth or childhood to deserve this sweetness, yet here I am smack dab in the middle of it. Wow. I think I'll re-up.